lawcomics.com

In the annuals of drunken college days, inebriated spring break debacles, and crazy party nights, one word is present in the craziest, most debauched tales. One word that strikes fear in the hearts of all who have gotten too close to it. One word that can cause muscle-memory dry-heaving in those who have abused it. The word? Everclear. It is prohibited by law in most states.  You might think – that’s a pretty weird law, but read on to find out why.

Everclear Grain Alcohol is a neutral grain spirit, which means it is low in the impurities that are by-products of fermentation related to most types of alcohol. Since those impurities (called congeners) are supposed to be what causes hangovers, a lot of people are under the misconception that you won’t get a hangover if you drink Everclear. This is not necessarily so. Everclear doesn’t have much of a taste, so people will tend to drink too much, or mix it’s already high proof alcohol with other types of alcohol.

Point and case: the Tucker Max Death Mix. We learn on his website (and in the movie I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell, if I’m not mistaken) that the Tucker Max Death Mix is a mixture of Everclear, Gatorade, and Red Bull. Presumably the Gatorade will help keep you hydrated and the Red Bull will help keep you awake. I’m inclined to just take his word for it – the combination sounds lethal.

Everclear comes in two proofs (a term that indicates the amount of alcohol actually contained in the spirit) – 151 and 190 proof. So that means that the 151 proof Everclear is 75.5% alcohol, while the 190 proof is 95% alcohol. Compare that to what we’ve considered “hard” liquor – vodka, bourbon, etc. previously. They are usually 80-120 proof, which means they contain 40-60% alcohol. The bottom line – Everclear is jam-packed full of alchohol.

It contains so much alcohol, in fact, that it is illegal in many states. The 151 proof is only available in a few states, and the 190 proof is available in even fewer. In some places, Everclear is illegal in both proofs – in others you need a special license to buy it. Some photographers use it to clean lenses, and for some mysterious reason it’s OK for pharmacists to have.

Luxco Company, formerly The David Sherman Company, manufactures Everclear. They are manufacturers of many other brands of liquor, like Rebel Yell, Admiral Nelson’s, El Mayor, and Salvador’s. The company, which has been in business since 1958, offers the following words of wisdom on its website:

Work Hard
Have Fun
Get the Job Done
Do the Right Thing

As the makers of one of the most potent alcoholic beverages on the market, you can bet on the fact that they are hoping people do the right thing. Think about sipping on some Rebel Yell instead of Everclear, and letting the next guy obtain a brand new Everclear story to tell his friends.  And it makes you know it’s not such a stupid law after all.

by EM Johnson